There are two reasons I occasionally indulge in FFF. The first is I have a secret crush on Advizor and he enjoys FFF. The second is that I like to write.
I really do enjoy writing. I love the entire process of brainstorming ideas and then developing those ideas. I forget who, but I vaguely recall reading a poet who compared her writing process to giving birth. Sadly, as much as I love it, no matter what the story or how much I may like what I've written, I always wait anxiously for the criticism.
I blame Miss Bitch (my nickname for a particular high school teacher). I was a Junior at the time. She taught World Lit. I forget now exactly what the assignment was. We were supposed to write a report. I forget the paper. But I remember the introduction. My introduction was from the eyes of a caveman; initially telling his stories orally and then later recording some through prehistoric artwork. I was proud of that introduction. It was, to date, the most creative thing I had ever written. She returned the papers a few days later. On mine, she wrote the introduction "sounds copied". She graded accordingly. I argued some, but knew there was no point arguing much w Miss Bitch. I've always been mad at myself for not arguing more forcefully. I think that's also a part of why I get so irritated when I think someone now is being fair towards me. And it probably contributes to my always expecting the worst.
The comments I get from others mean a lot to me. Everyone has been so supportive and have always had had a kind word. I need to tell everyone that your are great.